Journalists Baffled By Own Brains....

Britain's top journalists were baffled today when an image of muddled, visual data assembled itself in their brains as a vaguely human-looking figure. The following image caused particular bafflement at the offices of the Daily Mirror.

Journalist Hamish Spammer described his reaction to the picture: "I immediately had the urge to circle it, I don't know why." He continues "I've always had this urge. When I was a child and all the other kids were playing with their hula hoops in the traditional manner, I would lie back in the grass circling random clouds hoping to pick out a cat or a dog... it was weird.... I found a tractor once...."

As Spammer wept gently whilst wistfully remembering his lost youth, other Mirror churnalists engaged in a bitter battle as to what the random cluster of visual data should be labelled "It's a mermaid" screamed sports expert Speck Tannerfield, "No it's Kanye." Protested showbiz expert Jock Vapid "This is clearly his illegitimate love child. Fucking mermaids."

Editor Lloyd Lazy Fucking Clickbait Hack Is This what Journalism Has Come to Embley had his own opinion "For the sake of furthering the noble cause of click-bait, and the revenue it generates, we are running with a demon in the headline."

"That shit generates hits" he drools between bites on the hearts of Woodward and Bernstein "No one cares about actual news anymore. Screw that. Demon babies are the way forward. Do I believe it's a demon? Ha, ha. ha.... no. I'm lazy, not stupid."

"I'm aware that David Hume said "There is an universal tendency among mankind to conceive all beings like themselves, and to transfer to every object, those qualities, with which they are familiarly acquainted, and of which they are intimately conscious. We find human faces in the moon, armies in the clouds; and by a natural propensity, if not corrected by experience and reflection, ascribe malice or good- will to every thing, that hurts or pleases us." But frankly, that guy didn't have deadlines to hit or advertisers to appease, so fuck him. Fuck him in the ear."

When asked how "based upon the fact that ultrasound machines work by emitting high-frequency sound waves into the body, thus detecting membranes boundaries between soft tissue, hard tissue and fluid, what could the demon actually be  composed of, as it must clearly be a physical object?" Embley slowly transformed into this kitten and ball of wool. 

Awww..... look at it. It likes wool. Awww... what were we talking about?

Some internet "skeptics" have thus far attempted to futilely suggest a rational explanation for what is clearly an in utero demon. The Mirror journalists have dodged these protests as nimbly as a kitten playing with a lovely ball of wool.... aw www... "Yes. The skeptics have rational explanations such as pareidolia: a type of illusion or misperception involving a vague or obscure stimulus being perceived as something clear and distinct. But frankly it won't matter when the paranormal pages on social media get hold of this, They don't listen to anything that challenges their beliefs."

Others have challenged the identification of "demon." Intergalactic despot and fictional anime villain Frieza made the following claim: "This is clearly me in my final form, it has a power level of over 9000!" He goes on "I'm every bit as likely as a demon. There's as much empirical evidence that demons or I actually exist...NOW YOU PAY!!! YOU VILE FILTH SUCKING MAGGOTS!! YOU WILL RUE THE DAY YOU CROSSED MY PATH!! PREPARE YOURSELF TO EMBRACE OBLIVION!!!!"

The debate rages on. I guess we'll never know. 

Short Reflections on the Coventry Guild Hall "Ghost".

Anyone else seen this in the News recently? A supposed green glowing phantom appearing behind Michael D Higgins, as the Irish president gave an address in the Coventry Guildhall. Original story here: http://www.coventrytelegraph.net/news/coventry-news/look-ghost-spotted-during-irish-6969292

The first thing I noticed when checking the gallery of photos in the Coventry Telegraph is that the rest of the photos clearly show that whatever the effect is, that it is also reflected in the floor of the hall.

The Green "apparition" reflected in the polished floor.

                                   

A little research revealed that the tapestry behind the Irish President is protected by a special form of glass which protects the piece from certain wavelengths of light. I think the "phantom" is simply light from one of the attending TV crews studio lights. In the top photo, the outline of a chair in front of this glass clearly makes up the right-hand side of the "apparition".

Its due to this that I think this apparition is simply light from studio lights, reflecting off the protective glass and then on to the polished floor. Could be vice versa. It's something for us to REFLECT on! Sorry...

A Demon Debunked!

Here's an image that has been circulating around the paranormally inclined on the net for a little while now. Variously described as either a "demon" or an extraterrestrial looming over the bed of a terminally ill patient (who died some after if you believe the story that is coming along with this in many cases), what this actually presents is an example of how our eyes can deceive us, and how our minds seek to organise random data based on our cultural bias.

So.... Quite creepy. The "shape" certainly resembles a hunched, deformed figure. But what are we actually seeing here? Here's an excellent breakdown of the "demon's" constituent parts from a metebunk user.

Now I don't know about you, but once I viewed that breakdown I could no longer "see" the demon or alien in the original image. That's the power of pareidolia and a great example of why we should never just believe our eyes when it comes to assessing indistinct images of alleged paranormal entities. 

Too Busy To Be Well-Informed?

A frequent allegation put to me when I pop up and debunk some nonsense story or image on one site or another is "you must have a lot of time on your hands." The implication being that some people are just too busy, too rushed off their feet, to fact-check information they are passing on to others. I say that if you are too busy to actually check that something you are sharing is actually true, DON'T SHARE IT. If you do you are guilty of spreading misinformation, can this have a dangerous side effect? In most cases, no, but consider the effect that a little fact checking would have had during the MMR scare back in 1998. There is little doubt that rates of incidence of these preventable illnesses have risen as a result of the propagation of inaccurate information. The worst thing about this is we now live in a time when sources of information have never been so easily accessible to the general public.

So how long does it take to "debunk" a false story? Seconds in many cases. Take this example a friend posted on Facebook.

Now, I'm no fan of Palin, and she certainly has the capability to say legitimately stupid things... But this seems too good to be true for her critics. In fact, it sounds remarkable like satire... which is exactly what it is. it took me no longer than 30 seconds on Google to find the original source... The Daily Currant, a satire site. http://dailycurrant.com/2014/03/20/palin-wonders-if-flight-370-flew-directly-to-heaven-2/

Here is a paranormal tale that took minutes to completely destroy using nothing more than a Google image search. Here're the story and image accompanying it. 

"Judith Tompkins was only eight years old when she disappeared in the late 1800's, Her father was rich and he dabbled in photography. This was the last image taken of Judith before she disappeared. Her father died in prison after being convicted in her disappearance. This image shows a hint that something else may have been at work."

Now my first thought was that this image was a case of photoshop with regards to the 

hand, and in the case of the "faces" under the bed. A search for the original
image seemed to confirm this.

As you can see, the original image comes from a 1902 Christmas card. And sure enough, a
closer look reveals no hand and no faces. 

This took literally no longer than three minutes and didn't require any special skills, just Google, and a curious mind. Being well informed shouldn't optional it should be mandatory. And when you have literally the largest source of information at your fingertips, you have no excuse being anything else.